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.He should tell me that.”Guy makes a noise and my eyes flick to him.He smiles weakly at me.“He’s not going to tell you.”“Why?”“Because,” Park says from the doorway, “it’s ancient history.” He folds his arms in front of his chest and glares at the floor.“Go home, Lucy.”“Stop being an ass,” Hope whispers.Park smiles at her, but it’s cold, unfriendly, and it sends a chill down my back.“You can go home, too, Hope.”“Fine,” she says.“I’ll go to Lucy’s.We can get to know each other.”Park is across the room so quickly I don’t even register his movement until he’s between me and Hope.“Stay the fuck away from her,” he seethes.“I’m not going to contaminate her,” Hope throws back.“You contaminate everything you touch,” he shouts.Hope rears back at that as if he hit her.“Park,” Guy warns with just one word.Without taking his eyes off of Hope, Park steps back.“Fuck it.I’ll leave.You all have a nice visit.”I sit dumbfounded, unable to do anything but watch as he walks away.What the hell just happened? I close my eyes for a moment and take a shaky breath.I feel like I just lost Park before I ever really had him.22ParkI drive for hours.By the time I roll through the drive thru for a burger, it’s early evening and I have a massive headache from the chain of cigarettes I’ve smoked.The music doesn’t help either, but the louder I keep it, the more it drowns my thoughts.And the deeper I can sink them the better.I’ll take the physical pain in my head over the pain my mind can cause any day.Pulling behind the back of the building, I shift into park and lean my seat back.I close my eyes in an attempt to relieve some of the throbbing in my skull.But all I see is Lucy, sitting at the table with Hope.Fuck.I unwrap my sandwich and shove half the thing in my mouth.It’s greasy and tastes like shit, but I choke it down anyway.I need something in my stomach because my next stop is for alcohol.Lots of it.I have no idea how long Hope’s planning on sticking around, but I’m going to need to be drunk to deal with it.I crinkle the oily paper in my fist and toss it on the passenger side floor.When I’m back on the road, I light my last cigarette and add the now empty pack to the trash lining the floor.I skip to a more mellow song, trying to relax.I hate that I allow Hope to get to me.It’s not even her, really.It’s what she represents.I know that, but I have this gut reaction at the sight of her.No matter how many times I tell myself to get past this shit—I can’t.I hold onto it like a life force, as if letting it go will cause it all to happen again.Her timing couldn’t have been more perfect.I needed the reminder because I nearly let myself get close to Lucy.I’m pissed at myself for the slip and I feel like shit for what I know I’m going to have to do, but I can’t let it go on.It’s already gone too far.I pull up in front of the small house that is home to my three band mates.I don’t come here often, but they’re always good for a party.And that’s exactly what I need right now.The door’s hanging wide open and I can hear the rumbling bass of the TV induced gunfire before I even shut the car off.Two girls are sitting on the porch smoking a joint like it’s legal.I almost don’t recognize Remy—also known as Yoko by everybody in the band except the drummer.And that’s only because he’s her boyfriend.She cut her hair up to her chin and dyed it a deep black.She looks good, but I know how crazy this chick can get, so I usually avoid her.I pluck the joint from between her fingers as I pass by, making eye contact with her friend.She’s cute and might just be what I need tonight.“Puff, puff, pass,” Remy says, holding out give-me hands.I raise a brow and take a long hit.“Come on, Park.I need to get my buzz on before the house fills up.”I take another drag and start to hand it back, but shift at the last second, holding it out to the friend.She smiles as she takes it and I know I’ll be getting acquainted with some part of her body before the night’s over.“The guys are inside,” Remy announces.I don’t acknowledge her as I lean closer to the friend.“What’s your name?”“Erika.” Her eyes tumble down the length of my chest and I grin.“Well, Erika, I think I’m going to be here awhile.Come find me later.”“She has a boyfriend,” Remy spits [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]