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. I maybe could have been a bit more subtle, but there wasno point.He smiled again, quick and genuine. Okay.Let s go. He reachedaround as if looking for his wallet, but I was too quick for him.I had atwenty in my hand, and I tucked it under the empty beer glass on the tableand stood up. You don t have to pay for everything, you know, he said,but he wasn t really arguing.It took us a while to get out of the restaurant, with every person inthe place needing to give him a personal goodbye as if he were going off27Into the Light | Kate Sherwoodto war.By the time we made it out to the sidewalk, my nerves were back,but now at least I was sure that I wanted to fight through them. You want to try Zio s? Ryan suggested. Or we could go to my place. Again, I was a bit confused aboutthe different rules.That would have been pretty sleazy, probably, if I dsaid it to a woman.But if I d suggested it to a guy friend, it would havebeen fine.Where did Ryan fit in?  I mean, I m not a great cook, but I mokay.I ve got I don t know, we could do pasta, or a stir-fry.Or howlate is Bart s open? Bartleby s was the closest the town had to a gourmetfood shop. Have you had their grass-fed steaks? They re pretty good.Ryan checked his watch, then grinned at me as he pulled his phoneout and hit a speed-dial number. Hey, Paulo? Are you guys closed?Yeah? Are you still there, though? He made a face at me. Yeah, okay,he s a bastard, you re a slave, I know.But, listen can I come by and pickup a couple steaks? And maybe some side dishes whatever s good. Helistened again. Yeah, so I ll owe you. He smiled, and it probablyshouldn t have made me want to hit this Paulo asshole in the face, but itdid.Apparently once I d decided that I was attracted to Ryan, I was goingfor the full cave-man approach.Interesting, since I wasn t normally allthat possessive about the women I dated.Ryan finished up his call with a cheerful,  Okay, we ll be there ina few minutes, and then turned to look at me. You ve been in town longenough to know the names of the right places that s good.But have youbeen here long enough to know who you need to call at those places? Paulo, huh? Maybe you can introduce me. I tried to keep mytone light. Or maybe not I like being the one with the hook-ups. Hegrinned, and we headed off down the street towards Bart s. Sorry aboutthat.In the bar.I swear I like attention as much as the next guy, but it s a28Into the Light | Kate Sherwoodlittle much, sometimes.Especially since I feel like a total fake the band son the way, but we re not exactly burning up the charts. Yet.I mean, being on your way is more than most people evermanage.And I ve never heard you play, but Danny and the guys sayyou re really good.He grinned. Danny and the guys? Is that how you think of them? I don t know I guess.I mean I work with Evan, and we refriends.And Jeff s a good guy.But Danny s the one I know best.If theyall split up, Danny s the one I d still hang out with. Just hang out? We were walking, facing the same direction, but Icould tell he was keeping a pretty close eye on my reaction. Nothingmore? I mean, Dan s gorgeous, and you guys are pretty close& how comeyou re thinking about this now, with me? Not some other time, with him?And that seemed like a bit of a challenge to my honesty policy, butI struggled to meet it. I ve thought about it.With him.Like not details,but, yeah, I ve I don t know.It s occurred to me.But he s Danny.How could I put that into words?  He s well, partly, he s Justin s, youknow? I mean, I was never attracted to Justin.We were pretty muchbrothers.And then when Danny came along, he and Justin were so intoeach other, there d have been no point.I guess I just got into the habit ofnot thinking about him that way. This wasn t coming out quite right. And, also you know, I m I don t know, I guess maybe not quitestraight, but mostly.I think.I like women.A lot. So what are you doing, then, Chris? He sounded genuinelycurious, and a bit concerned. One bad breakup doesn t mean you have tototally switch orientations. No.It wasn t it wasn t a bad breakup.It was a good breakup.Almost all of my breakups lately have been good. I wasn t sure if he wasgetting the point, here. But I think maybe that s bad.Like there s notenough passion for us to even have a real fight [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]