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.He handed it over, reliefbleeding through his face at not having tobe the one to open it.It was a plain brown rectangular box.Nothing out of the ordinary, unless youcounted the fact that it was addressed toa dead girl.I shook it, frowned, and thenread the shipping label.I don't have to tell you what was in thebox, do I, Hope?I'd never understood why you were somad when you found out it wasbackordered.I'd laughed when you'dgotten the email about the order, how itwasn't in stock and wouldn't ship forweeks.You'd thrown the biggest tantrumI'd ever seen, which got even worsewhen I made fun of you.I just didn't getwhy you needed to have that damnednecklace so soon when it was supposedto be for graduation.Actually, you told me it was your giftto yourself for finally getting free of thislife.Stupid me.I guess I'd just assumedyou meant graduation.Tears prickling my eyes, I picked upthe knife next to the butter dish andstabbed at the tape seam.It gave wayeasily, and I flipped the top flaps back.Mom emitted a wail and buried herface in Dad's neck.But, no one elselooked away as I pulled the smaller boxout from its bubble-wrapped prison.Adeep breath, and I lifted the lid of thesmaller box.Nestled inside on a little puffy pillowlay the heart-shaped pendant you'd fallenso in love with.Pink glass with dozensof tiny lines coursing over its surface, itresembled everything we'd becomesince you've been gone: shattered.But we were still trying to glueourselves back together again.I held up the necklace for everyone tosee. She& she ordered this, I said, mytone wooden, dull. Before.They toldher it was out of stock.That she'd haveto wait& Mom wrenched out of Dad's grip andflew at me.She hooked her arms aroundmy neck and reeled me in.That waswhat broke the dam.The tears welled upin my eyes and spilled over as I huggedMom tightly. Shh, baby, Mom sniffled in my ear. I'm here.Let it out.Julian continued to rub at myshoulders, a soothing wall of support.Doug shuffled up next to us, and Momlifted one arm to pull him in, too.Then,Dad was there.His arms circled aroundall of us, held us together so none of uswould float away.I don't know how long we huddledtogether, and I don't really care.Wewere together, sharing in that moment ofpain.That's the important thing.The onlything that really mattered.After the emotional fallout fromreceiving your package, we all stucktogether pretty tightly.For that wholeday, we just lazed around, doing nothingof real importance.We watched moviesin the family room, played card games,and just shared the same space.Throughit all, none of us could forget the reasonwhy we clung so tightly to one another.After dinner, the phone rang.Itstartled us all a little to hear it.Thehouse had been so quiet these pastweeks, the shrill ring felt out of place.Doug jumped up from the table toanswer it. Jules, he called from the hallway. It's for you.His call lasted until well after wewere already done eating.Mom and Dadhad already retreated into the familyroom to catch the evening news, whichleft Doug and I with dish duty.Juliancame back into the kitchen, a frowncreasing his brow. I have to go, hetold me.I stood up and looped my arms aroundhis waist.He cupped my face in his bighands and rubbed the pads of his thumbsacross my cheeks, just under my eyes.His mouth slanted over mine, drawingme in with a gentle yet demanding kissthat left me breathless and clinging tohim.A throat cleared behind us, but neitherof us bothered to turn.We were too lostin each other in that moment. Hannah,Doug said, clearly irritated. I'm notdoing all these dishes myself. Whenthere was still no response, Doug blewout an exasperated sigh. Hannah. Yeah, yeah, I mumbled. I'mcoming.Reluctantly, Julian released me. I'llsee you tonight? he asked as he rubbedhis nose against mine.At my nod, hepressed a quick kiss to my lips and left.After Julian was gone, Doug sidled upnext to me. I always knew this daywould come, he lamented. You sound like it's the end of theworld. I looked over and gave him aWTF? look.He shrugged. Yeah, well, Jules is myfriend, Hannah, and I'd rather not have tobreak his legs.I rolled my eyes. You and Dadshould compare notes. I turned awayfrom him to start gathering up the dishes. Come on.You wash.I'll rinse.He groaned but started helping.True to his word, Julian showed up athis usual time that night, and he stayedthe whole night.We spent the dayyesterday hanging out at the beach withGlory and Doug.I wore the little yellowbikini that Julian liked so well.In return,he stayed on freckle patrol, and by day'send, I didn't have any more than when I'dstarted out.So, I considered it a success.We got back to the house late, beerand pizza in hand.We all gatheredaround the TV and watched movies,RomComs that Glory had picked out.When the last credits rolled, we all wentupstairs to bed.Glory with me; Julianwith Doug.The sun is just peeking over thehorizon now.I wish you could see it.Pinks, oranges, and reds, all battling tobe the first seen.It's absolutelygorgeous.Stunning really.You'd like it.You really would.Everything is starting to fall intoplace.It could almost be perfect.Well,not without you.Never without you, butit can be good.It can be really good.And it is.It really is.MAY 16 (AGAIN)I'M MORE CONFUSED THANEVER now, Hope.I just& I just don'tknow what to say anymore.What didyou expect? What did you think wouldhappen? Why did you do this to me?How many more surprises am I in storefor?Deep breaths, Hannah.Okay& maybe I should back up here.Imean, I'm not really making much sensenow& am I?I found your gift.MAY 16 (AGAIN)EVERYONE WAS UP surprisinglyearly for a Sunday morning.Julian wasthe first to follow his nose downstairs.He smiled when he entered the kitchenand saw me.Then, he made a beeline forthe coffeepot.I knew I came first withhim, but coffee would always be a very,very close second.He filled his mug andthen slithered over to my side and satdown. I missed you last night, hemurmured in my ear.He nibbled lightlyon the lobe, which shot tinglesthroughout my body. Sleeping with yourbrother just isn't the same thing. Hmm, Doug doesn't like to cuddle?He chuckled softly and circled hisarms around me. On the contrary [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]